JPCC Kota Kasablanka Service 3 (27 Mei 2018)
Kita masih akan berbicara mengenai Habits atau Kebiasaan. Yesus katakan bahwa Dia datang agar kita mempunyai hidup dan mempunyainya di dalam segala kelimpahan. Dia tahu bahwa hal tersebut tidak terjadi begitu saja, ada proses yang harus kita jalankan.
Seringkali kita tidak sadar bahwa yang mempengaruhi sebuah hasil akhir atau outcome dari kehidupan kita adalah habits atau kebiasaan-kebiasaan yang kita punya.
Ada yang mengatakan bahwa 90% dari kehidupan kita terdiri dari kebiasaan yang kita punya. Kebiasaan adalah suatu tindakan yang kita lakukan tanpa berpikir, tanpa disadari dan berjalan secara otomatis.
Ada begitu banyak rutinitas yang kita lakukan setiap pagi dan setiap hari tanpa banyak berpikir terlebih dahulu, itu sebabnya kebiasaan ini sangat berpengaruh dalam hidup kita, karena kebiasaan kita akan membawa kita ke suatu tempat, baik itu kegagalan atau keberhasilan.
Karena itu Alkitab berkata bahwa kita harus memperhatikan bagaimana cara kita hidup, kita harus memeriksa dan memperhatikan dengan sungguh-sungguh bagaimana cara kita hidup, kebiasaan-kebiasaan kita, karena kita melakukan-nya tanpa berpikir lagi dan kita melihat hal ini sebagai sesuatu yang normal.
Opening Verse – Karena itu, perhatikanlah dengan saksama, bagaimana kamu hidup, janganlah seperti orang bebal, tetapi seperti orang arif, Efesus 5:15 TB
Sharing Ps. Jeffrey – Kita adalah mahluk yang punya kebiasaan, ada orang yang punya kebiasaan tidak bisa makan dan menikmatinya kalau tidak memakai sambal. Saya juga seperti itu, tetapi saya bukan orang yang kemana-mana harus membawa sambal, tetapi ada orang yang pergi ke luar negeri sampai membawa sambal
Begitu juga ada orang yang selalu minum kopi setiap pagi-nya, atau ada juga orang yang makan apa saja, selalu dengan kecap manis. Begitu juga ada orang-orang yang biasa suka tidur malam, kebiasaan berjudi, merokok, atau kebiasaan untuk menonton situs pornografi.
Sebaliknya ada juga kebiasaan baik seperti bergereja, pergi dengan keluarga dan suka membaca Alkitab, ada juga yang punya kebiasaan buruk seperti suka gosip, menguping, suka memfoto setiap kejadian hidup seperti foto sebelum makan dan melihat siapa yang meresponi hasil postinhan fotonya di social media, atau kebiasaan untuk selalu sedikit-sedikit melihat HP.
Ada orang-orang yang punya kebiasaan untuk menitip barang disaat teman keluar negeri, atau ada juga yang punya kebiasaan makan es krim sebelum tidur, atau minum teh sebelum tidur. Pada kenyataan-nya, kita semua punya kebiasaan.
Supporting Verse – Lagipula dalam doamu itu janganlah kamu bertele-tele seperti kebiasaan orang yang tidak mengenal Allah. Mereka menyangka bahwa karena banyaknya kata-kata doanya akan dikabulkan. Matius 6:7 TB
Kita seringkali merasa terpesona pada orang yang bisa pandai berdoa dengan kata-kata yang begitu bagus, tetapi bukan itu yang membuat Tuhan mendengar doa kita.
Sebagian kita sadar akan kebiasaan buruk tetapi kita tetap melakukan-nya, bisa jadi karena kita suka, atau kita pikir itu hal yang rohani, atau tidak tahu bagaimana cara-nya untuk berhenti.
Sebagian besar orang yang berjudi, merokok, atau melakukan hubungan seks bebas. Mereka tahu bahwa kebiasaan itu tidak baik tetapi mereka tidak punya kuasa untuk menghentikan-nya.
Di setiap iklan dan bahkan di kotak produk rokok selalu ada peringatan akan bahaya merokok, tetapi mereka tetap membelinya. Kebiasaan buruk bisa mengekang dan kemudian mengendalikan hidup kita.
Bisa saja kita setuju akan pemberitaan Firman Tuhan, begitu semangat dan berapi-api setelah ke gereja tetapi kita bisa kembali ke pola yang sama setelah-nya.
Saya suka mengingatkan jemaat agar tidak terlalu sering foto saat sesi ibadah tetapi hal ini tetap saja terjadi. Peringatan belum tentu bisa diindahkan dengan orang, apalagi jika itu sudah menjadi kebiasaan bagi orang tersebut.
Ada juga orang yang punya kebiasaan buruk tetapi mereka tidak pernah berpikir bahwa kebiasaan itu tidak baik, mungin dikarenakan kurang informasi, atau mungkin karena semua orang di sekitarnya melakukan hal yang sama, sehingga dia tidak pernah ditantang untuk berpikir bahwa hal dan kebiasaan ini tidak normal.
Hanya karena semua orang melakukan-nya, bukan berarti itu kebiasaan yang baik.
Sharing Ps. Jeffrey – Beberapa waktu yang lalu, teman saya Jhony memperhatikan kebiasaan saya untuk membeli kopi. Dulu saya suka membeli 3-4 kopi setiap hari-nya di kedai kopi sekitar kantor kami yang lama. Saya melakukan-nya dalam waktu yang cukup lama dan tidak melihat ini sebagai sesuatu yang aneh, sampai teman saya ini datang dan membuat saya berpikir.
Dia berkata bahwa, “Pernahkah saya berpikir berapa banyak uang yang saya habiskan selama sebulan untuk membeli kopi?
Kemudian dia membantu menghitung berapa besar biaya yang saya habiskan selama sebulan dan bahkan untuk setahun dari kopi. Sewaktu saya lihat itu, saya terkejut karena angkanya cukup besar.
Sebenarnya saya bisa menggunakan bubuk kopi yang dibuat dan dibawa dari rumah, sehingga saya bisa mengirit begitu banyak uang, dan sejak saat itu, kedai kopi di kantor kami yang lama ini kehilangan salah satu pelanggan setianya.
Kita sering berpikir bahwa gaji atau penghasilan kita kurang, tetapi mungkin itu disebabkan karena kebiasaan-kebiasaan yang kita kembangkan menuntut kita untuk megeluarkan uang lebih banyak dari seharusnya.
Jadi perhatikan rutinitas kita, dan ada dimana ujungnya, pikirkan ini dan jangan sampai kita kaget pada saat kita sakit atau kena kasus serta kegagalan, seperti Perceraian, Tumor, Kanker dan Aids.
Kita tidak lahir dengan kebiasaan, Kita-lah yang menciptakan kebiasaan, bukan saja sekedar menciptakan, tetapi kita juga kemudian dibentuk oleh kebiasaan itu.
Kebiasaan adalah seperti benih yang ditanam di rumah, dan kalau bertumbuh besar akan menjadi pohon dalam rumah kita, kebiasaan yang baik akan menjadikan hidup bertumbuh, berbuah banyak dan lebih produktif, serta memperlengkapi kita untuk sebuah keberhasilan.
Sedangkan kebiasaan buruk adalah kebiasaan yang kita sadari itu tidak baik tetapi kita terus melakukan-nya dan tidak tahu bagaimana caranya untuk berhenti. Mari kita baca Kisah Simson, Seseorang yang menggambarkan kebiasaan buruk yang begitu kuat dan menyebabkan dia untuk tidak bisa melepaskan diri dari hal ini.
Kita tahu bahwa Simson adalah orang yang luar biasa dan punya kekuatan fisik luar biasa, dia sanggup mengalahkan orang banyak dengan sendirian. Tetapi dia punya kebiasaan jelek yaitu gampang “Jatuh cinta” dengan seorang wanita, dan kebanyakan dengan wanita yang tidak baik atau wanita sundal.
Supporting Verse – Sesudah itu Simson jatuh cinta kepada seorang perempuan dari lembah Sorek yang namanya Delila. Lalu datanglah raja-raja kota orang Filistin kepada perempuan itu sambil berkata: “Cobalah bujuk dia untuk mengetahui karena apakah kekuatannya demikian besar, dan dengan apakah kami dapat mengalahkan dia dan mengikat dia untuk menundukkannya. Maka kami masing-masing akan memberikan seribu seratus uang perak kepadamu.” Lalu berkatalah Delila kepada Simson: “Ceritakanlah kiranya kepadaku, karena apakah kekuatanmu demikian besar, dan dengan apakah engkau harus diikat untuk ditundukkan?” Jawab Simson kepadanya: “Jika aku diikat dengan tujuh tali busur yang baru, yang belum kering, maka aku akan menjadi lemah dan menjadi seperti orang lain mana pun juga.” Lalu raja-raja kota orang Filistin membawa tujuh tali busur yang baru yang belum kering kepada perempuan itu dan ia mengikat Simson dengan tali-tali itu, sedang di kamarnya ada orang bersiap-siap. Kemudian berserulah perempuan itu kepadanya: “Orang-orang Filistin menyergap engkau, Simson!” Tetapi ia memutuskan tali-tali busur itu seperti tali rami yang terbakar putus, apabila kena api. Dan tidaklah ketahuan di mana duduk kekuatannya itu. Kemudian berkatalah Delila kepada Simson: “Sesungguhnya engkau telah mempermain-mainkan dan membohongi aku. Sekarang ceritakanlah kiranya kepadaku dengan apa engkau dapat diikat.” Jawabnya kepadanya: “Jika aku diikat erat-erat dengan tali baru, yang belum terpakai untuk pekerjaan apa pun, maka aku akan menjadi lemah dan menjadi seperti orang lain mana pun juga.” Kemudian Delila mengambil tali baru, diikatnyalah dia dengan tali-tali itu dan berseru kepadanya: “Orang-orang Filistin menyergap engkau, Simson!” — di kamar ada orang bersiap-siap — tetapi tali-tali itu diputuskannya tanggal dari tangannya seperti benang saja. Berkatalah Delila kepada Simson: “Sampai sekarang engkau telah mempermain-mainkan dan membohongi aku. Ceritakanlah kepadaku dengan apakah engkau dapat diikat.” Jawabnya kepadanya: “Kalau engkau menenun ketujuh rambut jalinku bersama-sama dengan lungsin lalu mengokohkannya dengan patok, maka aku akan menjadi lemah dan menjadi seperti orang lain mana pun juga.” Kemudian perempuan itu mengokohkan lagi tenunan itu dengan patok, lalu berserulah ia kepadanya: “Orang-orang Filistin menyergap engkau, Simson.” Tetapi ketika ia terjaga dari tidurnya, disentaknya lepas patok tenunan dan lungsin itu. Berkatalah perempuan itu kepadanya: “Bagaimana mungkin engkau berkata: Aku cinta kepadamu, padahal hatimu tidak tertuju kepadaku? Sekarang telah tiga kali engkau mempermain-mainkan aku dan tidak mau menceritakan kepadaku, karena apakah kekuatanmu demikian besar.” Hakim-hakim 16:4-15 TB
Simson jatuh cinta kepada Delila, dan Delila melihat Simson sebagai sarana untuk mendapatkan uang. Seharusnya dari satu atau dua kejadian diatas saja, Simson tahu bahwa Delila yang menyerahkan dia ke Raja-Raja Filistin. Delila terus mencoba dan Simson sendiri sama sekali tidak menghindar darinya.
Tiga kali Simson membohongi Delilah, tetapi tiga kali itu juga setiap kali dia dirayu, dia datang lagi. Kalau ada beberapa dari anda yang berpikir bahwa “Koq Simson begitu ya? Delilah baru ngomong begitu saja, dia langsung mau diikat oleh Delilah”, maka anda terlalu Naif.
Karena ada “sesuatu” yang terjadi dan tidak diceritakan oleh Alkitab. Tidak mungkin Simson secara tiba-tiba bisa “tertidur”. Saya yakin kalian semua tahu apa yang terjadi disini sehingga Simson mau terus kembali dengan Delila.
Supporting Verse – Lalu setelah perempuan itu berhari-hari merengek-rengek kepadanya dan terus mendesak-desak dia, ia tidak dapat lagi menahan hati, sehingga ia mau mati rasanya. Maka diceritakannyalah kepadanya segala isi hatinya, katanya: “Kepalaku tidak pernah kena pisau cukur, sebab sejak dari kandungan ibuku aku ini seorang nazir Allah. Jika kepalaku dicukur, maka kekuatanku akan lenyap dari padaku, dan aku menjadi lemah dan sama seperti orang-orang lain.” Ketika dilihat Delila, bahwa segala isi hatinya telah diceritakannya kepadanya, disuruhnyalah memanggil raja-raja kota orang Filistin, katanya: “Sekali ini lagi datanglah ke mari, sebab ia telah menceritakan segala isi hatinya kepadaku.” Lalu datanglah raja-raja kota orang Filistin itu kepadanya sambil membawa uang itu. Sesudah itu dibujuknya Simson tidur di pangkuannya, lalu dipanggilnya seorang dan disuruhnya mencukur ketujuh rambut jalinnya, sehingga mulailah Simson ditundukkan oleh perempuan itu, sebab kekuatannya telah lenyap dari padanya. Hakim-hakim 16:16-19 TB
Disaat Delila membujuk Simson untuk “tidur dalam pangkuan-nya”, ada sesuatu yang pasti terjadi sebelumnya. Samson yang begitu kuat akhirnya luluh oleh rengekan Delila. Tiga kali Simson dihobongi oleh Delilah, dan tiga kali juga setiap dia dirayu, dia kembali datang lagi.
Orang sekuat simson bisa sedemikian lemah di hadapan seorang wanita dan rengekan-nya. Tetapi masalahnya apa yang membuat Simson terus kembali dan terus mau dibohongi, dia tahu bahwa wanita ini yang menjebak dan mengikat dia, tetapi dia tidak bisa menghindarinya. Simson ditundukan oleh perempuan yang menjadi kelemahan-nya.
Cerita ini menggambarkan kebanyakan orang yang tahu bahwa pergaulan, kebiasaan-kebiasaan, dan situasi yang dipunyainya itu tidak baik tetapi mereka tidak bisa lepas dab menghindarinya, dan sebaliknya terus datang kembali lagi.
Berikut adalah beberapa tips supaya kita bisa menang dari kebiasaan-kebiasaan buruk :
1. Mengaku
Kita harus berani mengakui kalau kita punya kebiasaan buruk tersebut, kalau kita tidak mau mengaku, maka kita tidak akan bisa ditolong. Kalau kita bilang “hal ini” tidak ada, bagaimana hal itu bisa ditiadakan?
Contoh : Orang yang menyangkal punya kebiasaan minum-minum, beralasan karena bersifat kadang-kadang dan hanya dilakukan disaat pesta saja.
Supporting Verse – Jika kita berkata, bahwa kita tidak berdosa, maka kita menipu diri kita sendiri dan kebenaran tidak ada di dalam kita. Jika kita mengaku dosa kita, maka Ia adalah setia dan adil, sehingga Ia akan mengampuni segala dosa kita dan menyucikan kita dari segala kejahatan. Jika kita berkata, bahwa kita tidak ada berbuat dosa, maka kita membuat Dia menjadi pendusta dan firman-Nya tidak ada di dalam kita. 1 Yohanes 1:8-10 TB
Karena itu hendaklah kamu saling mengaku dosamu dan saling mendoakan, supaya kamu sembuh. Doa orang yang benar, bila dengan yakin didoakan, sangat besar kuasanya. Yakobus 5:16 TB
Sangat penting untuk kita berani mengaku, dan sadari bahwa hal itu ada agar hal itu bisa dicabut dari hidup kita.
Kita perlu mengaku dan sadari agar kita bisa ditolong. Perlu untuk saling mengaku dosa kita, ada orang yang perlu kita bawa, terbuka dan akui akan dosa yang kita lakukan.
Kiita perlu saling mengaku dosa dan saling mendoakan agar bisa sembuh. Baru setelah ini dikatakan bahwa doa orang benar besar kuasa-nya. Seringkali kita hanya tahu bagian kedua ini, padahal yang penting ada di atasnya, dimana kita sebelumnya harus saling mengaku dosa. Berani-lah untuk mengaku dosa, kesalahan dan kebiasaan-kebiasaan yang buruk.
2. Support System
Jangan hadapi semua ini dengan sendirian, punyai-lah support system atau komunitas yang bisa membuat kita “accountable” dan bertanggung jawab, serta tidak menghadapi persoalan dan kebiasaan buruk dengan sendirian.
Supporting Verse – Janganlah kamu sesat: Pergaulan yang buruk merusakkan kebiasaan yang baik. 1 Korintus 15:33 TB
Jangan berteman dengan orang yang lekas gusar, jangan bergaul dengan seorang pemarah, supaya engkau jangan menjadi biasa dengan tingkah lakunya dan memasang jerat bagi dirimu sendiri. Amsal 22:24-25 TB
Diperlukan pengaruh orang lain untuk membuat kebiasaan baik kita berkurang, dan juga sebaliknya. Kita butuh orang lain untuk mempengaruhi kita, perlu orang lain agar kita bisa mempunyai kebiasaan yang baik.
Kita bisa saja tidak punya kebiasaan untuk marah atau cepat naik darah, tetapi karena kita suka bergaul dengan pergaulan orang-orang yang suka marah, kemudiam kita akan meniru kebiasaan tersebut dan dibentuk olehnya.
Kita perlu support system, Itu sebabnya di Aplikasi Fitness, sering ada link yang terhubung dengan social media agar kita bisa share kegiatan disana dengan orang-orang yang ada di grup yang sama, dan menjadi terpacu untuk maju bersama-sama.
Begitu juga dalam aplikasi membaca alkitab bersama-sama si JPCC yang bernama “Read to Hear”, disaat membaca sendirian mungkin kita akan melakukan-nya dengan bolong-bolong tetapi akan lebih mudah disaat melakukan ini bersama-sama.
Sharing Ps. Jeffrey – Saya juga melakukan habit yang baru, dan dimulai beberapa tahun lalu untuk selalu share ayat firman setiap pagi dan setiap hari kepada istri dan anak saya. Saya lakukan ini karena saya butuh support system dalam hidup.
Saya mengirimkan ayat yang bisa dimengerti dan relevan bagi istri dan anak saya yang berusia 16 tahun dan 9 tahun. Ini menjadi kebiasaan yang baru, dan disaat ada hari dimana saya mengirimnya agak sore, mereka akan bertanya “kok telat mengirimnya?”,
Ini berarti ada “Accountability“, mereka mengawasi saya juga, dan itu yang saya sebut sebagai support system. Saya juga melakukan ini disaat sedang travel ke luar negeri, dari sebuah keharusan menjadi kebiasaan.
3. Kenali Pemicu-nya.
Kenali apa yang memicu kebiasaan yang buruk, dan coba ganti dengan sesuatu yang baru dan baik
Kebiasaan dan kecenderungan itu mungkin saja terjadi disaat kita sedang nganggur, sendirian di rumah, berada dalam tekanan, baru terima gaji, atau lapar. Atau bisa juga disaat kita ada dalam setting tertentu, yang menyebabkan kebiasaan buruk yang sudah kita lepaskan kembali terulang lagi.
Sharing Ps. Jeffrey – Saya lahir dan dibesarkan sampai berumur 12 tahun di surabaya, saya tidak lagi berbicara seperti orang surabaya, tetapi saat datang ke surabaya dan dikeliling oleh orang surabaya, maka saya akan segera dengan leluasa berbicara dengan aksen surabaya.
Begitu juga saat saya berkunjung ke belanda dimana saya tinggal lama disana dulu. Saya bisa dengan leluasa mengulangi kebiasaan dan hal-hal yang biasa dilakukan disana dulu. Belum tentu kebiasaan buruk, bisa saja kebiasaan baik.
Seringkali orang yang datang ke reuni sekolahnya, mengingat lagi perkara-perkara lama yang dahulu dilakukan dan meskipun sudah begitu lama ditinggalkan, dan akhirnya menjadi kembai mengulangi perkara-perkara lama yang sudah berhasil ditinggalkan.
Hati-hatilah karena ada suasana dan setting tertentu yang bisa membuat kita kembali mengulangi kebiasaan lama yang sudah kita tinggalkan.
4. Berdoa
Meminta kepada Tuhan untuk berperkara dalam hidup kita, mengaku kepada Tuhan terlebih dahulu, meminta diberikan jalan keluar dari kebiasaan ini dan punya kekuatan untuk meninggalkan kebiasaan ini, agar kita bisa mendapat pertolongan tepat pada waktunya.
Kemudian untuk mengembangkan kebiasaan-kebiasaan yang baru, kita bisa mempelajari kebiasaan-kebiasaan orang yang sukses, baik dalam bisnis, pendidikan, dan pernikahan.
Kalau kita ingin punya iman yang teguh, punya integritas, serta berhasil dalam hubungan pernikahan, pelajari itu dari orang-orang yang terkebih dahulu sukses melakukan-nya, jadikan mereka teman dan support system kita agar kita bisa mengembangkan kebiasaan yang baik.
Pelajari dan Adopt kebiasaan-kebiasaan mereka yang telah berhasil melakukan-nya. Disaat kita melakukan ini, Kita akan temukan bahwa kita tidak akan jadi sama lagi dengan kita yang dulu, dan hidup kita akan berubah.
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