Tuhan Tidak akan Menyerah Dalam Kehidupan Kita (Sharing gathered by Betty & Alive Magazine 2016)
Opening Verse – 9:20 Siapakah kamu, hai manusia, maka kamu membantah Allah? Dapatkah yang dibentuk berkata kepada yang membentuknya: “Mengapakah engkau membentuk aku demikian?” 9:21 Apakah tukang periuk tidak mempunyai hak atas tanah liatnya, untuk membuat dari gumpal yang sama suatu benda untuk dipakai guna tujuan yang mulia dan suatu benda lain untuk dipakai guna tujuan yang biasa?
Sampai kemudian saya mengalami masalah dalam hubungan dengan pasangan saya, meski demikian saya memutuskan untuk tetap tertanam di dalam DATE. Seiring berjalannya waktu, saya mulai belajar mengenal tentang kebenaran Firman Tuhan. Saya mengikuti kelas-kelas yang telah di sediakan JPCC seperti COB, COL, COC, Deeper Bible, dll.
Pada saat saya mulai dekat dengan Tuhan, badai kehidupan mulai saya rasakan. Saya mengalami masalah di tempat saya bekerja. Dengan suasana pekerjaan yang saya sangat tidak kondusif, saya memutuskan untuk mengundurkan diri meskipun belum mendapat pekerjaan yang baru. Tanpa mempunyai pekerjaan, makin hari kondisi keuangan saya makin menipis hingga akhirnya saya tidak mempunyai uang sepeser uang pun dalam tabungan saya. Padahal awalnya saya adalah pribadi yang cukup mandiri secara finansial, bahkan saya berkontribusi untuk mendukung keuangan keluarga.
Saya merasa sendirian. Saya merasa tidak akan ada yang menolong saya. Saat itu pun saya masih belum mengerti arti DATE sesungguhnya sehingga saya merasa tidak punya siapa-siapa. Saya benar-benar tertekan dan tak tahu lagi harus berbuat apa. Namun di saat itulah, pertama kalinya dalam hidup saya, akhirnya saya datang pada Tuhan dan saya menangis.
“Pada saat saya mulai dekat dengan Tuhan, badai kehidupan mulai saya rasakan.”
Pada saat rasa putus asa rasa mulai memenuhi benak, saya menangis dan memohon kepada Tuhan, “Tuhan, aku tidak minta apa-apa. Aku tidak tahu besok bisa makan atau tidak. Kiranya Tuhan mencukupkan segala sesuatu.” Setelah saya berdoa dan memohon kepada Tuhan, ajaibnya keesokan harinya ada uang masuk ke rekening saya. Mukjizat demi mukjizat kembali terjadi, ketika saya kesulitan dan memohon kepada Tuhan dan Tuhan menolong saya. Saya belajar Tuhanlah yang memberkati saya, bukan karena hebat saya. Saya sangat bersyukur untuk badai kehidupan yang Tuhan izinkan terjadi dalam hidup saya. Lewat badai itulah saya bertemu dengan siapa Tuhan yang saya percaya dan kebenaran atas kuasa-Nya.
TUHAN TAK PERNAH MENYERAH DENGAN SAYA
Bersamaan ketika masa-masa sebelum saya mendapatkan pekerjaan baru, ada sebuah peristiwa ketika kedua tulang rawan kaki saya retak akibat terlalu banyak berlatih treadmill dan aktivitas outdoor saya yang terlalu intense sehingga terjadila hal ini. Dan setelah bertemu dan konsultasi dengan Dokter Spesialist Lutut, prognosisnya menyatakan bahwa saya sudah tidak bisa sembuh dan operasi tidak bisa dilakukan karena saya masih bisa berdiri dan dokter gambling untuk melakukan operasi karena dikhawatirkan setelah operasi akan menyebabkan kelumpuhan.
Saya merasakan nyeri yang luar biasa hebat meskipun hanya untuk berjalan biasa. Saat itu dokter menyuruh saya untuk berhenti apapun bentuk latihan dan olahraga karena sangat berbahaya untuk kondisi lutut saya. Dan seumur hidup saya harus bergantung pada satu macam obat untuk menahan rasa nyeri itu. 2 tahun saya menjalani hidup seperti itu, sering kali lutut nyeri tidak tertahankan, lutut saya seperti ditusuk pisau tajam, dan setiap memakai sepatu hak tinggi selama 5 menit air mata tidak bisa ditahan karena rasa nyerinya.
Singkat cerita ketika saya mengikuti Community Of Counselors, saya belajar kebenaran tentang kuasa Tuhan dalam segala hal. Saya ingat pada saat kelas ini, ada sesi yang membahas theologi penyembuhan oleh Dr. Budi dan Erick, ditekankan dari pengajaran ini bahwa tidak ada yang tidak mungkin dalam nama Tuhan. Setelah sesi pengajaran, ada sesi altar call dan saat itu saya didoakan oleh Ike, Ministry Coordinator di COC dan Tante Yanti Radjagukguk.
Saya berdoa dalam hati, dan ingin percaya bahwa meski secara logika saya berpikir bahwa saya tidak bisa sembuh tapi kalau Tuhan berkehendak, sembuhkan saya. Doa Ike berkata demikian, “Tuhan akan berikan tulang lutut yang baru untuk Betty dimana Betty akan memuliakan dan melayani Engkau”.
Besoknya, saya masih bertanya-tanya, tetapi ingin mencoba untuk kembali memakai sepatu heels dan ternyata saya sama sekali tidak merasa sakit. Walaupun saya sudah sembuh, bukan berarti saya bisa seenak-enaknya, saya tetap ber-olahraga secukupnya dan tidak melakukan olahraga seforsir high-impact seperti sebelumnya.
Dalam kelas ini, saya juga selalu diingatkan tentang pentingnya punya pola pikir yang benar sesuai dengan firman Tuhan hingga kuasa penyembuhan. Saya kembali berdoa dan Tuhan mendengar setiap doa yang saya panjatkan. Perlahan-lahan kesehatan kaki saya mulai dipulihkan. Saya mulai dapat berhenti dan tidak lagi mengonsumsi obat penahan nyeri. Saya bahkan sudah bisa kembali berolahraga hingga akhirnya saya sudah diperbolehkan kembali treadmill.
Saya belajar bahwa dulu saya selalu sibuk dengan dunia sendiri, tetapi sekarang saya tahu bahwa saya diciptakan bukan untuk diri sendiri, dan disitulah Tuhan bekerja, apa yang terjadi adalah teguran agar saya bisa mencari Dia. Dengan membatasi olahraga, saya punya waktu untuk mencari Tuhan, buka hati, dan melayani Tuhan di dalam JPCC Classes.
Saya mungkin bisa menyerah dalam kehidupan, namun Tuhan yang saya sembah tidak akan menyerah dalam kehidupan saya. Ketika saya siap membuka hati saya dan mengizinkan Tuhan bekerja, saya mulai merasakan kuasa, intervensi, penyertaan, kasih, serta penggenapan janji-janjinya dan jawaban atas setiap hal dalam kehidupan saya. Saya mulai masuk kedalam pelayanan, saya sungguh dapat merasakan kasih Tuhan. Hidup saya mengalami perubahan yang signifikan dan merasa lebih bahagia.
Jika Tuhan bisa mengubahkan kehidupan saya, maka Tuhan bisa bekerja dalam kehidupan kita semua dengan caranya. Tertanamlah dalam komunitas yang memiliki visi misi yang sama. Kelilingi diri dengan orang-orang yang selalu mau maju. Jangan pernah berhenti mengandalkan Tuhan dalam segala hal, karena bersama dengan Tuhan kita akan terus berjalan dari satu kemuliaan ke kemuliaaan.
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